THE EMOTIONAL ISSUE
New Issue!
Should you take a psych course?
The million dollar question every student has asked themselves desperately at least once
As the winter semester creeps around the corner, you may be shuffling through course calendars trying to find something that will boost your abysmal GPA. Take this highly accurate quiz to find out if taking a psychology course is the right move for you or not.

The campus’ famous pigeons are walking in front of you on the way to a lecture. You are already running late and the pigeons are blatantly in your way. What do you do?
  1. Shoo them away with your feet.
  2. Accept your fate and be late for class.
  3. Start barking and flap your arms to scare them away.
  4. Walk on the road and cut in front of the pigeons.
Thanks to your wonky schedule, you have a four-hour gap between classes. How are you spending your time?
  1. Bold of you to think I’ll be going to class.
  2. Go to the Eaton Centre for a quick bite but walk out with three bags from a spontaneous shopping spree.
  3. Sneak into a movie theatre using your OneCard and rest there until a movie starts.
  4. Study at the Sheldon and Tracy Levy Student Learning Centre, sixth floor body chair to just be held stairs.
Let’s see how well school has prepared you. The mitochondria is the ___ of the cell.
  1. What is a mitochondria? When did we learn this?
  2. Membrane.
  3. Powerhouse.
  4. Correction, there are multiple mitochondrions so HA.
Think fast! Which of the following says the numbers two, zero, two and four?
  1. 2024
  2. 2044
  3. 2004
  4. 0044
How do you write your notes?
  1. You write them on the back of your hand and hope you don’t run out of skin before class ends.
  2. You're an iPad kid. You will never be caught writing notes with a pen unless it costs over $100 and is branded with an apple.
  3. You listen and absorb the information and pray it sticks around long enough for exams.
  4. You handwrite your notes, then type them out before uploading them to Quizlet for flashcards.
You have to make a phone call to book a doctor’s appointment. What do you do?
  1. Make your mother call the doctor.
  2. Write down your script and then give up after the fifth automated voice message.
  3. Skip the appointment and pray your crippling tummy pain is just the ten iced coffees you’ve had in the last two days.
  4. Cry at the thought of human interaction and check WebMD.
In what order do you eat your burgers and fries? There is only one right answer.
  1. Fries, burger, fries, burger.
  2. Finish the fries, then eat the burger.
  3. You put your fries in your burger and call it a day.
  4. Obviously, finish the burger then eat the fries.
You forgot your classmate’s name, who you have been sitting next to the entire semester and taking homework answers from. Too embarrassed to ask them for their name, what do you do?
  1. Ask them to spell their name and hope it's not an obvious name like John, Bob or Rob.
  2. Ask them for their email address or Instagram username and hope it’s not zaynmaliksleftshoelace123.
  3. Just referring to them exclusively as “my guy’’ or “heyy” when starting a conversation.
  4. Just ask them again and say you have short-term memory loss.
Finally, let’s get down to colour theory. In school, what colour was your science notebook?
  1. Red, it’s the colour of blood.
  2. Yellow, duh. Photosynthesis requires the sun, which is yellow.
  3. Green, of course. Plants, grass, trees, it’s all GREEN.
  4. Blue. The sky is blue, that’s why. Science.
Here are your results:

Mostly As:
Psychology isn’t for you but trust me, PCS 181 “Introduction to Astronomy” might just be the course for you. With little room for error, you’d love to calculate the orbit of asteroids. Amidst all the other things in your life that you cannot control, this class would be the perfect place for you to feel right and in the driver’s seat for once. Between the constant calculator clicking and the numbers on numbers being thrown at you about the size of Jupiter’s third-largest moon, you will forget all your worries.

Mostly Bs:
You probably wouldn’t take psychology but hey, you already knew that. You probably spend half your paycheck at a fancy cafe every week to be different from the Balzac’s, Tim Hortons and Starbucks students. You want to be different, you’re not like other girls. That’s why, when everyone was taking this quiz to find out if psychology was for them, you just took the quiz for fun—-you already know which bird course you’re taking. Between shuffling through Reddit posts from a decade ago to scrolling through bird course lists, you are convinced GEO 793 “The Geography of Toronto” is for you. Quit wasting your time on this quiz and go explore the city with your expensive coffee in hand or whatever.

Mostly Cs:
Take the psych course! You know it, I know it, your friends know it, the person you were blatantly staring at for 10 minutes straight knows it. My point is, everyone knows you can’t go a second without psychoanalyzing everyone you encounter. The girl sitting at the other end of the library cracking her knuckles? She was definitely the oldest child forced to parent her younger siblings. The person in the food court covering their mouth as they laugh? Definitely grew up self-conscious and it’s obviously not something stuck in their teeth. Long story short, take the damn course and quit judging people for free—take some steps to at least get some money out of it.

Mostly Ds:
Avoid the psych course at all costs. I repeat, AVOID the course. You are an old soul. You don’t like to believe in all this psychology stuff. You should stay as far away from any of the bird courses and instead put your big brain to use in perhaps an organic chemistry course. You have no time to waste studying people, planets or cities. The sound of test tubes clinking or calculators clicking takes you to a mentally safe space where you are free from human interaction and other worldly desires.
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02:19:25